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daily parcels * tied up in string *

daily musings of a vintage addict * I am totally obsessed with all things vintage * trying to keep up with my past...and sometimes ordinary everyday life

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Location: Culburra Beach , NSW, Australia

I live in Australia, my ancestry is in Cornwall. a Celt. a hedgewitch of sorts. I am an Earth Healer. I wear upcycled clothes, patchouli oil and Redback boots. A gypsy. An eccentric. a mystic. I am a searcher, a seeker, a pilgrim on Earth. I serve my guests, tea from an old silver teapot. I love Vervain, yarrow, chamomile & mint. I love to dream, to walk and to wonder

Plan ahead and dream of all the beautiful things that life has to offer

May 26, 2006

puppets on strings


seems to me that relationships are one of THE hardest things to manage in our life - I was never going to 'chat' about my second marriage but I think I will. If you aren't interested - don't read - plain as that.
I married my second husband not very long after my first was killed in the car accident - looking back - it was way too soon but I was young and 'in love' ... things were fine and dandy for a few years and my gorgeous daughter ms*louisa was born the first year of our marriage - so all the heartache that I endured was worth it......but something happened and he met someone else... my heart literally shattered. It was the most horrific time of my life. I was left with two children and a broken heart. He walked away, callously I think. Leaving me to deal with the pieces.
I visited pyschics and counsellors and psychiatrists - trying to find an answer. The only answer is time and a belief in yourself. One pyschic told me that I was like a lotus - buried underneath all the muck and oneday I would come up out of that muck and bloom like the gorgeous lotus blossom. And I believe I have ! I am actually happy that I went through that - first of all, I would not have met my 'soul mate' if it had not occured and second - it has made me who I am.
It is so common these days - men walking away from marriages or relationships, leaving children and breaking a womans heart (oh I know it happens the other way too, but more often than not, it seems to be the men walking away) I can't even post what I think of men who do this - you would probably never visit again. I could slap them silly !!! They give you ultimatums - mine was not to see any of my family again and he 'might' consider returning to our home. Can you believe, that I actually considered that? huh? They pull the puppet strings, one minute wanting to be in the folds of the family unit, next walking away again. And you really do feel like a puppet on a string - until you take your control back.
there is one lady out there who is going through a dreadful time right now and I guess this is what spurred me to post this ........but honey, just remember who you are - a strong, vibrant woman who is worth more than is being offered right now. Stay true to who you are * there is better in your future!
xoxo much love

16 Comments:

Blogger melissa said...

We'll all hold up our sweet friend together. Thanks for sharing your story.

Have a wonderful day now. ;)

11:24 am  
Blogger Nicole said...

I have always believed that we are forever learning in life.... and that whether it be a good or bad experience, it helps to make us who we are at this moment, and then we find yet another lesson to learn. I have had a very bad experience with a past relationship, only to walk away with more strength, and knowledge to succeed another day. We are extremely lucky to have such a 'powerful' network of friends to 'prop' us up in times when we cannot find the strength to do it ourselves. Ms*Robyn, Your compassion yet again blows me over. Hugs xox

12:20 pm  
Blogger Peggy said...

I too have been thru this and thought I was at the end of my life. Thank God I held on and seeked help to get thru a time when I considered ending my life. I am a very strong person now from what I went thru and I am very loved by a wonderful man! Whoever your friend is I hope you leans on your strength and hangs on for the best is yet to come!!

2:25 pm  
Blogger gena said...

A very personal post Robyn and very sad,you have been through it,but it also is very uplifting,you have shown that even when life throws the cruelest blows at us,it is always for a reason,and better things are ahead.You are an inspiration and a very good woman!

4:29 pm  
Blogger Lee-ann said...

Ms*Robyn, I am in orr! of your strength and your convictions on life. Something like this will never go away I know that but will always remind you that your life now is so very full and with family and friends a joy to live and the sadness before that was all for a reason maybe it made you who you are today a strong, yet gentle and a very dearing person there is a reason for everything in our lives it is not about choices it is about survival and you are a survivor that is for sure.

If I could just say as you know there are many out here who have walked the same path and those of us who are lucky make it to the cross roads and walk on further to a life worth living. My first husband left me one night while I was working at a restaurant to help with the monies and when I got home my husband & our two little children were gone and 4 years later I found them...........thank you for sharing your story today it reminds me that I too am lucky today and sometimes I do forget.

7:11 pm  
Blogger Connie and Rob said...

Dear Ms Robyn,
We have been through very similar situations in our life. Each loss was just devestating at the time. We always want to blame ourselves because that is the way we are conditioned to think.

We need to get across to your friend...All women are incredibly strong and I do say all. You just have to reach down inside and pull it out of you. Don't let any man ever let you believe you are not worthy of the best life you can possibly get for yourself. There is always an incredible man out there waiting for you to be you partner and not drag you down.

Hugs to you and best of luck to your friend,
Connie

7:50 pm  
Blogger berriehead said...

Oh dear hon:( I got your note to my last post on my blog just now:( yesterday I deleted it .....in error! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I didn't realize I hit the delete button instead of the other and pufff it was gone* I was sick when I realized it:( dear lawd ya must think I'm a cuukooo bird........ maybe I'll start another ...off to work I go mwaaaaa! xo

9:40 pm  
Blogger Gail said...

By sharing our experiences, we touch others and help them thru their own trials, yes woman are special and some take a little help to realise their lives can be changed and sometimes thru grief,pain and even desolation,true love can be rekindled and we can start believing again, thru love,faith and hope.Your special, very special,thankyou.

10:23 pm  
Blogger Gina E. said...

Isn't it amazing what comes to the surface after one person bares her soul? Ms Robyn, you have a talent for bringing this out in all of us here! I don't talk much about my first husband (after six years of marriage he was having affairs), as Mr Second gets annoyed if I discuss Mr First! So I just don't. But one of my friends who is thrice married has been harshly judged by people who don't know her circumstances, and she is much like you. First hubby killed in a car smash, second marriage lasted six months because he only wanted someone to cook and wash for him (could have hired a housekeeper) but third marriage was made in heaven!

11:17 pm  
Blogger Orange Blossom Goddess (aka Heather) said...

Thank you for sharing your heartache in the hopes of easing someone else's.

12:44 am  
Blogger Naturegirl said...

Ah yes to meet your soulmate and live happily ever after...and we have done that!! Yes we all have bumps in life that we learn lessons from.Happy that your life is on track again with many blessings! :)

2:41 am  
Blogger Holly said...

Amen-absolutely everything you said was perfect, for your situation, our friend's situation and far far too many other women's as well.

9:31 pm  
Blogger Mimi said...

I don't know if 'amazing' is the right word, normally it is used for something good. But I am amazed at how many of us have been through this. And how at the dark, dark time, I know I felt like all was lost, such deep despair. And yet, somehow, we grow back stronger. Somehow we start over. And with time, we can talk about it a little, and reach out to our friends, and let them know, they are not alone.

I would never dare to say 'I know how you feel' as I sometimes think it can invalidate you a little bit, but to be able to say that 'I have been through a similar situation, I felt awful then, and I feel bad for you now- and you are not, not alone, we are here for you' I think that is something special.

Thank you so much for sharing, Ms Robyn, and I am so glad you found your someone special,

love Mimi xxx

PS None of my post here is meant to be inflamatory in any way. I know when people say 'I know how you feel' they are just trying to help. I hope my words have come out as they were meant- in a positive way!

12:44 am  
Blogger Sharon K said...

I to went through a realationship like many of you. After a 21 year marriage my x-husband left me for a younger women. I thought it was the end of the world but I also found out that when one door closes another door opens and Charlie and I found each other and I am so happy. It also made me a stronger women.

12:18 pm  
Blogger dolly said...

sigh how many times do we hear this story ~ I have been there too, in a different sort of way. Thanks so much for sharing Robyn, as ever, when I visit it here I learn more about not just you but more importantly about me

love to you dollx

10:21 pm  
Blogger Tongue in Cheek Antiques said...

Robin! Brava! A good beautiful message: Rmember who you are!
You are one of the best!

3:01 am  

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